May 28, 2017

Funny thing called love

Love sure is a funny thing
You whine about being single
How lonely you are
Because
You love someone who doesn’t love you back
But at the same time
You reject someone who love you to death




"Haha...Kelakar kan?" - Fattah Amin, 2017
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Forget how to forget

How to forget someone?
The one that been there for you through ups and downs. The one that understood you, knew you better than yourself. Believed in you, supported every effort, gave you confidence. Easy.
At first, end all type of communication. Delete her number, delete all the conversation, call history. Don’t forget your social media. Facebook, Twitter, Instagram. Mute her, block, unfriend. The choices are various. Next, all her possessions with you, throw them all away. Don’t hesitate just throw it away.
Then just occupied yourself with other things. It is hard. You’ll cry every day before sleep, while taking shower, when hearing her favourite songs (accidentally) and at one point even the breeze can remind you of her, thus making you cry. She appears in your dream, either sad or happy or it’s just like the old time. Maybe sometimes you just wish you don’t wake up because when you do, you’ll end up crying more. It’s okay. Time will heal they said.
Some said the pain will just go away. Others said you just get stronger, get over it. Heck, I didn’t know. Maybe you’ll need closure. Like the one in movies or drama. Events that will make you wake up and realize that all in the past. That it’s just you the one that’s still suffering while she already forgot it all.
No matter how hard you tried, there is a piece of her within you. The memories, linger still. You can’t just delete it like deleting old unused file in the computer. She just leave a dent, that is impossible to be normal again. But that’s okay. You’ll learn to embraced it, appreciate the memories and even thanked her.
So you won’t forget her. You never will.
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May 19, 2017

Smile

This smile was built on lies and illusions. Coated with hope and fantasy. Unfortunately, It can’t repel reality. It will kill me, instantly. Its killing me inside.
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May 10, 2017

Have faith

We are always in denial
We say that we are okay without someone that can text us at 3 am where all of the wildest thoughts begin
We say that we don’t need someone to calm us when we are in storm
We are so pretentious that we can live alone without everyone
but in a sorrowful night
We shed our tears silently
knowing there’s no one that we can put our shoulder to cry one
We are human
It’s our nature to be in love and to love
It’s obvious that at the end of the day
our heart & soul is needing someone
Someone that gonna be there regardless of situation & time
If you haven’t found one
have faith
Put your trust on "The One"
that time will come
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April 21, 2017

Reject

We’ve all heard the stories of those being rejected,
How painful it is to give your heart to a person but it ended up being crushed.
The tears, the suffering, the thought of being not good enough for a person.
To be the one to reject someone, is it wrong? Am I evil to say no to a person I do not love? Am I cruel for rejecting a person who I think is not good for me? Do I not deserve someone who I love? That I know will live a happy life with me.
Love is weird yes I agree. We do not choose who we love. But we can’t force it either. Why accept someone when you know there is nothing there? Should I accept every confession? and end up having numerous breakups because it didn’t work out?
The rejected will always get the pity. Those who are rejected will always be the ‘good ones’
The person who rejects them? Heartless? Are they? Am I?
Everyone deserves to be loved, and being rejected is just a way of life telling you “no, not this one, I have something better”
Instead of hating a person for rejecting you, how about take it as a way for you to improve. To love yourself and those who love you back.
Love hurts. It’s just a way to know it exists.
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March 25, 2017

Lost

This is one of those times when I desire nothing but silence.

Some peaceful, undisturbed silence.

This is when all of my repressed emotions I come out to play. My walls are my sanctuary and my emotions are my sole companions.

I am as vulnerable as a newborn and as unstable as a bull. Nothing and everything can make me lash out, either in anger or in tears.

And this is the time when reality leers at me with everything I have been avoiding,

I am completely and utterly lost, and there’s nothing I can do about that.
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February 9, 2017

Not This.

When I stopped caring,
you and your selfish soul,
still want me to think about you.
But all that’s left was just hatred and rage.
But, luckily,
No.
This isn’t what I want.
I don’t want to hate you,
nor like you.
I just want to forget you.
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January 22, 2017

Ikhlas?

Dalam dunia ini, apa perkara yang kau rasa paling sukar didapatkan?
Harta? Dunia moden ini hanya alasan yang jadi penghalang.
Cinta? Zaman sekarang, cinta boleh dibeli.
Bagi aku satu perkara yang paling susah untuk aku dapatkan ialah
Ikhlas.

Ya, aku masih belajar untuk ikhlas.
Terkadang aku keliru, berapa peratus aku ikhlas, berapa peratus aku tidak.
Permainan persoalan ini terus bermain dalam rongga kepala ini.
Saat aku "ikhlas" bersedekah, tetapi dalam hati ini aku berharap semoga sedekah ini dibalas-Nya.
Saat aku membantu mereka, niat ini memang ikhlas. Bila tiba saat aku ingin dibantu, dan mereka tiada, jiwa ini mengungkit. Masa ak
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January 21, 2017

Some thought

So i got different types of moods.


Sometimes i just wander around and watches people living their life, and think, ‘isnt it amazing that every person got their own problems and still struggling and living for tomorrow’

and sometimes i feel like, this world sucks. How can people live in it with sooooo many unsolved problems?

But sometimes, i think that, this is life. No matter how bad, how freaking annoying that day or moments was, we still and we need to fight for tomorrow.

Yes, we are unsure about what is going to happen tomorrow. But shouldn’t we live our life like there’s no tomorrow?

(and right now, im just on those motivational-moods. But not for long)
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August 15, 2016

Tunggu

Pasti punya laut dalam kepalaku,
Yang ku dengar cuma hamparan ombak
Memecahkan antara khayalan dan realiti
Dan sebenarnya aku termanggu
Disudut paling ceruk kamarku

 Pasti sumringah kiranya
Andai kita bersama
Menikmati hari-hari tanpa noda
Apakan daya seorang anak muda
Terhampar beratus batu dari keluarga
Disini aku berpijak jauh dari negeriku

Aku berjalan, jauh dari sampingmu
Aku berteduh, tanpa naunganmu
Aku bersandar, tanpa hangat pelukmu
Meski tanpa kehadiranmu,
Aku akan tetap berkerja
Dan terus berkarya
Menuntut ilmu demi masa depan kita

Akan ku terus bertahan,
Meski kau jauh dariku
Meski kau tak di sisiku
Kerna aku tahu
Doamu disetiap hembusan nafasmu
Senantiasa mengiringi setiap langkahku.

Tunggu aku…
Akan ku persembahkan pada kamu
Mahkota ilmu. Yang aku cita-citakan
Yang membuatkan aku sanggup berpisah darimu
Tunggu aku…
Kembali ke teratak singgahsana mu
Dengan mahkota itu di kepalaku.
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